P.S. To My Dearest Parents: Can you be my friend?

 

Hello there, this is probably the first time you are reading what I am writing. However, I am sure we share a certain commonality that we face in our daily lives, “someone around us who loves to nag. Do you agree?”

During my secondary school days, whenever the word “nagging” comes to mind, I never fail to associate it with another word, “parents”. I experienced a lot of changes during this period, especially evident in the relationship with my parents and gradually, communicating with my parents became a real hassle.

My turning point in life is volunteerism with my friends at Blossom World Society. The rare treasure that I chanced upon “The Happy Formula”. The way to increase our happiness is simply to look at the positive aspects of everything and everyone whom we encounter, and this change in perspective brings about unlimited positivity and a burning desire to spread this to others.

While applying “The Happy Formula”, suddenly, something struck me. Why will someone do something which will potentially invoke unpleasant feelings in their children? Superficially, this seems counterintuitive. However, if we agree with the premise that parents only want the very best for us, then every bit of their behaviour will only consist of care and concern for us. It’s just that most of the time, it is disguised in a form which we dislike - - - Nagging.

My parents are always there for me when I need them, sometimes doubling up as a friend when I am feeling down and when I am in need of affirmation, assurance and understanding.

Allow me to share something from an older friend of mine. Her father lost the passion in life, doesn’t like to go out to socialize with his friends as he wants to avoid feelings of depression by knowing that more and more friends have passed on. This story makes me cherish my time with my parents even more. I do not want to miss the time of life with my parents, they accompany me to grow up, I want to accompany them to grow old. This incident invoke my feeling in my heart: what can I do for the old man?

Changing Perspectives, Changing Lives: What we can do?

In 2018, The Straits Times reported that there is an increase in suicidal rates among the elderly in Singapore. Statistics in 2017 show that for every three deaths due to suicide, one of them is an elderly, the highest percentage since 1991. According to experts, the main cause is due to feelings of helplessness brought about by relentless torment from illnesses, a refusal to become a burden to their families, feeling emotionally neglected. As Singapore’s population is aging, this is a significant problem to be overcome.

Therefore, I decided to launch a platform for interaction between seniors and young people. The seniors who have full of life experience to share with the young people and young people who are full of vitality and enthusiasm to serve and motivate the elderly. An activity that enriches the lives of both , and in this way, "Happy 3 Gen" was born.

If you are still reading this, I wish that you can join us in our cause to bring warmth to elderly. I would like to bring forth what I think is the main driving force within me to initiate this cause. Try recalling a time in your life which you experienced negative feelings. Perhaps it only took you a day or at most a few weeks to get out of it because you had a good talk with someone who understands you. Now, try removing this someone or support and see what happens. Is it much more difficult to get out of it? This might be the closest you might get to what the seniors are experiencing.

If it does not take too much of our time to be their supporter or game changer in their lives, why not do it?

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Short anecdote by Patricia Chia, Staff of Blossom World Society "BWS" and with BWS for over 10years.


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